Chapter 1: Understanding Our Mortality

We all face the reality of death at some point. So, how are you choosing to live in the present?

Photo by Francesco Corbisiero on Unsplash

Though I may be young, I am acutely aware that my time is finite. As Brad Roberts from Crash Test Dummies poignantly stated, "I’m still young, but I know my days are numbered." One day, all of my experiences and memories will fade into oblivion.

Take Pat, for instance. At 52, she has only attended two funerals: one for a coworker and one for herself. Her minimal exposure to death is a rare case of extreme avoidance. Conversely, professionals like hospice workers, death doulas, and thanatologists are immersed in the reality of dying, witnessing death multiple times daily.

Most of us fall somewhere in the middle. Statistically, about 67 million people are expected to pass away this year alone, assuming there are no catastrophic global incidents. We typically evade thoughts of death until it becomes personal—usually triggered by the loss of someone close or when it’s time to sort out our own affairs, such as wills and funeral plans.

As we approach the ages at which our parents passed away, we naturally begin to reflect on mortality. Personally, I am now the same age my grandfather was when he died, and I’m a decade younger than my father was at his passing. If I manage to extend my life by another decade, that gives me around 20 years left. At 20, that felt like an eternity, but nearing 60, it seems like just a fleeting moment.

I’ve already outlined my preferences for a peaceful departure, which are surprisingly limited: I'd prefer to pass away in my sleep, either in my bed or my favorite chair. I’m not open to other scenarios, like choking at dinner.

My father succumbed to congestive heart failure after a pacemaker malfunction, and my mother suffered a massive stroke. Although she passed away during a daytime nap, her death was still a traumatic experience that I wouldn’t wish upon anyone. Many of my relatives have faced similarly distressing ends due to Alzheimer’s, alcohol-related illnesses, and cancer—none of which seem like an appealing way to go.

Chapter 2: Facing the Reality of Death

Everyone is susceptible to cancer at some point.

Ultimately, something will claim each of us. People often say, "Death is a part of life," but in reality, our own demise feels vastly different. While we experience the death of others as part of life, the process leading up to our own end can be prolonged and agonizing.

The act of dying is intertwined with living, yet we often perceive death as an abstract concept until it hits close to home. Fear of the unknown plays a significant role in how we view death.

Despite significant technological advancements, the mystery surrounding death remains largely unsolved. Organizations like the International Association for Near-Death Studies gather testimonies from individuals who have had near-death experiences, providing insights that distinguish these encounters from mere hallucinations. Clinical studies show that many report positive and transformative experiences during brief moments of clinical death, yet no one can tell us what happens after life ceases for an extended period.

Chapter 3: Science vs. Spirituality in Understanding Death

Organized religions often propose that life serves as a preparation for a more significant transition afterward. They suggest that an initial phase involves reckoning with our life choices, followed by a judgment that determines our eternal fate—be it an afterlife or reincarnation.

In recent decades, a growing number of individuals have turned away from these traditional narratives, increasingly placing their faith in scientific explanations. Researchers are exploring cryogenics, which involves freezing and preserving bodies with the hope that future advancements may allow us to restore life.

Three prevailing theories about immortality have emerged. Extropians believe that advancements in healthcare will eventually allow humanity to achieve immortality. In contrast, transhumanists argue that we will enhance our biological capabilities through improved diets, fitness regimens, and technological augmentation. Lastly, singularitarians propose that by uploading our consciousness into a central computer, we can achieve a form of immortality, even as our physical bodies perish.

For now, however, death remains an inevitable part of life. Some will depart suddenly, while others will endure a protracted struggle. No one can predict the manner of their exit until it arrives.

As various philosophers and spiritual guides have suggested, contemplating our mortality could be the key to living a fuller, richer life.

Chapter 4: The Impact of Mortality on Our Choices

If you knew you had only three months to live, how would you prioritize your time? What experiences would you seek out?